Do you see this: V? That is V for Victory!

The US Fish and Wildlife Service has officially declared the eastern cougar extinct! That’s right, stupid cat, we got you! In your face!

A statement issued by the agency reads:

The US Fish and Wildlife Service conducted a formal review of the available information and … concludes the eastern cougar is extinct and recommends the subspecies be removed from the endangered species list. Only western cougars still live in large enough numbers to maintain breeding populations, and they live on wild lands in the western United States and Canada.

The eastern cougar was put on the endangered list in 1973. However, the agency’s lead eastern cougar scientist, Mark McCollough, believes the the big cat was extinct as far back as as 1930.

Lima, the 12-year-old Zebra that escaped from the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus in Atlanta back in February, was sentenced to death this month for its crimes.

The monumental decision angered enemy conspirator group PETA, but brought a sense of closure to the motorists trapped in rush hour traffic during the 40-minute chase that would end with Lima’s capture on the Downtown Connector.

While statistics have shown that African equids are euthanized more frequently than white equids in the States, I do feel justice was served fairly.