Minister Rick Oliver has not slept well since he pissed God off and got struck by lightning in 2006. As a result, the 51-year-old man-of-faith often gets through the restless nights toiling around his 17-acre farm near Raleigh, N.C.

At 2 a.m. on June 3, Oliver was working on his Chevy Malibu when he heard noise and foolishly decided to investigate. A young black bear struck him to the ground with a single blow.

I heard this strange huffing and the next thing I know, I had been run over and stepped on by a bear.

According to Oliver, he bled like a “hose” from a particularly deep cut to his wrist, one that doctors could not immediately sew up. The bear was not caught and remains at large.

Oliver blames leftovers “from lunch in a bag up on the top step” as the most likely reason for the bear to have found its way to his home. But, we all know he probably just pissed God off again.

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