Enemy conspirators Stephen Fry and zoologist Mark Carwardine recently traveled to New Zealand in search of an endangered, flightless parrot known as the Kakapo. But, rather than killing the bird and serving him up with a side of veggies and mash potatoes, the men simply aimed to document the rare parrot for the world to experience and appreciate.

What the world experienced, however, was a cold dose of reality as the Kakapo proceeded to brutally rape Carwardine’s head.

The Kakapo’s ‘O’ face is pretty scary. Can you imagine the vulgar things it would have said to Carwardine if it could speak like other parrots?

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